I finally reached my goal!!

On April 25th I finally reached my goal!! Yayyyy. My JCC moved me to 1700 calories from 1200 calories a day. I expressed to her that I was very nervous about doing this, she said "it will all work out, you'll see" She is easing me into it. 4 days of 1200 calories and 3 days of 1700 calories for 1 week, alternating them. Then 3 days of 1200 calories and 4 days of 1700 calories and so on till I am on 1700 calories everyday.
When I reached my goal, I weighed 129.7 lbs when I weighted myself this morning I was 134 pounds!! I am NOT liking this 1700 calorie thing! 1700 just seems to be too much food! Has anyone else felt this way when they go up in the calories and did you gain weight?

My cat "Tuesday" has been really ill. I noticed she has been drinking alot of water lately and sleeping more than she normally does and not eating. So I took her to the vet on April 13th, blood work was done. The test came back the next day showing she has acute pancreatitis which she has had in the past but this time it is alot worse. And she in the beginning stages of kidney failure. The vetis more worried about her pancreas right now than her kidney's. She was put on an antibiotic and a medicine called denamarin to treat the pancreatitis.
She finished up her antibiotics last night and has about 15 days left of the denamarin. She looks and acts like she is feeling much better. She will need to have her blood checked again in 3-4 month to check the kidney function.
Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers.

I am still off work due to increasing anxiety. I go back to see my Doctor on May 1st. I don't know if I am going to be able to return to work, or at least that job anyway.

down to a size 10!

Oh yeah I forgot to mention while I was drowning in my pitty party, that my husband and I went shopping for clothes, cause the shorts and capri's I have are from last year and they are a size 18!!! I am now in a size 10. That makes me happy!I have a question for everyone out there. When you got to your goal or was close to it, did you suddenly just feel like you had lost yourself, like you didn't know who you were mentally anymore? I have been experiencing that alot lately. I should be happy that I am down over a 100 pounds, but something, I am not sure what, is making me uncomfortable. Maybe it just have to do with the depression I am going through right now, or maybe it brought out more of my depression.

Not a good time

Sorry for the lack of posting. The month of March to present has not been good. Well, it started going down hill when my dad passed away Jan 4th 2007, and I think everything started surfacing in March. I don't believe I have come to terms with my dads death... I don't even know if I can. It's so painful I put my thoughts and feelings to the side and stuff it... numb it out. Then there is my job. I don't even know where to begin. My job has gotten so stressful, it's causing high anxiety on top of already high anxiety. I have been out on short term disability since March 6th. I am on medicine for depression and anxiety, have been for years. Apparently something isn't working. I have had my medicines changed around. Maybe it's the job I am doing, Maybe it's not for me... Hmm... time will tell. Even more great news!! When I weighed in at JC tonight I gained 3.7 pounds. I only worked out 2 times for 30 mins each this last week. So I hope for a better week this next week.